


Xenoblade Chronicles X: New Los Angeles

by Anon_E_Muss



Category: Xenoblade Chronicles X
Genre: Attempt at Humor, Frye Christoph Swears a Lot, Humor, Manga & Anime, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Spoilers, Swearing
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-10-01
Updated: 2020-10-02
Packaged: 2021-03-08 00:21:37
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,416
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26756455
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Anon_E_Muss/pseuds/Anon_E_Muss
Summary: Series of Xenoblade X one-shots eventually forming a sequel story to the main campaign.
Comments: 2
Kudos: 2





	1. Phog and the Spirit of Wroth

**Author's Note:**

> Aight. Since the Xenoblade X discourse appears to be picking back up again, might as well give the people what I can.

Wrothians. As a people, they were honorable, strong and prideful sometimes not in that order. As a culture, they were focused on military might and commitment to one's ideals.

It is for this reason that they cut ties with the Ganglion after a few months on planet Mira.

The humans and other races of NLA were quick to make friends with them. Prince Ga Jiarg agreed to stand together as mutual enemies of the Ganglion. Also, they looked like cat people.

With the Ganglion outliers weak and disjointed, the alliance was lasting longer than expected.

Officially, the human embassy to the Wrothians was Elma and her team. Unofficially, it was Elma, Lin, Rook, and whatever fourth member happened to be traveling with them.

Phog Christoph was not very combat savvy, nor was he much good at socializing. Even worse, was that as far as cats were concerned, he was public enemy number one. So naturally, when team Elma was down a member, Phog was Rook's first choice to help diplomatic affairs with the combative cat aliens.

Why Rook thought it was a good idea to take the prospector, he was certain he'd never understand. 

Rook, (A.K.A. Cross) stood at the entrance to ruins that the Wrothians had takennas a base. Prince Ga Jiarg had decided to honor them by coming out to greet them.

"Elma, Lin, Cross, good to see you doing well," Ga Jiarg said as his rust-colored fur can into view. He turned to the blonde newcomer. "I don't believe we've met. I am Prince Ga Jiarg."

"Phog Christoph. I'm a prospector."

"Your Majesty," Elma said, "we'd like to discuss business inside, if you'd please."

"Very well. There are certain matters that I would like to discuss with you as well."

They were lead inside by the armored prince. It was here that Phog was struck with his first question about Wrothians. "Excuse me, prince, but has anybody examined these ruins?"

"As a matter of fact, yes. One of your earth archaeologists was here a few weeks ago. The only thing he was able to discern was that the people who built this hall were the same ones who built the giant rings to the south."

From there, Phog's mind swept itself away to ponder what BLADE knew about Mira's past civilization, or civilizations for that matter.

Rook groaned when he saw Phog's hand go to his chin. Lin saw it too. "Let me guess," she said, "one of his high speed train of thoughts?"

Ga Jiarg looked inquisitively at the humans.

"He does this," Cross explained. "Sometimes a stray thought will cross his mind and he'll become so sidetracked that he drops the conversation altogether."

Ga Jiarg stopped to look at the BLADEs in his hall. "Really? Is this a common trait amongst humans?"

Elma said, "It's not uncommon for people to become distracted, but Phog is a bit of an extreme case."

"His brother, Frye once explained it to me pretty well," Cross said. "It's not quite that he has a one track mind, it's that his brain has so many thoughts running around at the same time that they constantly overlap and interfere with each other."

The Wrothian prince chuckled to himself. "We of Wroth are lucky to have such fascinating allies."

Elma took matters back to business. "He'll be like this for a while. It's best if someone just sits him down while we discuss current affairs."

Jiarg nodded and called to one of his subjects. A female wrothian came and more or less pushed Phog to the viewing platform without a word.

"I wonder what he's thinking of this time," Lin said.

"Best not to ask,” Cross said. “If you do, he'll never stop."

Just as the four of them were about to sit down, they heard an outraged cry and saw Phog flying across the cave.

Luckily, the spacey prospector landed on the smooth sand of the cave. Team Elma rushed to their comrade. "What happened?" Lin asked.

Phog sighed. "I asked a fair question."

"Okay but. . . what was the question?"

The white Wrothian that escorted Phog to the viewing platform came storming across the hall. Cross was half surprised that she wasn't hissing. Then he noticed what she was wearing.

Rook sighed. "It's the armor isn't it?"

Phog nodded but then said "I'm really not sure if that qualifies as armor."

As the white furred Wrothian approached, she drew a photon saber.

"Ne Fuerje!" Ga Jiarg roared, "We do not draw weapons in the presence of our allies!"

She pointed it to Phog, who had assumed the crisscross sitting position. "This-" there was a hissing that apparently not even planet Mira would translate, "dares mock our capacity to forge and create suitable armor."

Other Wrothians murmured their thoughts and opinions.

Elma leapt to Phog's defense. "I'm sure he meant no offense."

"In all fairness, I probably could've worded it better."

"Wait," Lin said. "What exactly is the deal?"

"I asked why the Six Stars' heavy and medium armors are so revealing," Phog nonchalantly explained.

Tatsu chose to add his two bits. "Nopon have no armor, but Tatsu agrees with foggy friend. Why do kitty-cat people cover everything except the front?"

Ne Fuerje hissed again. "'If the Wrothians are a warrior people,' were your exact words, 'why is there a gigantic navel door?'"

"Well there is," Phog meekly defended. "And for that matter, why is it only on the female armors? Are you people hoping that your enemies will see enough skin to pacify them?"

There were angry yowls from various Wrothians. "Phog Christoph," Ga Jiarg said, "I think it might be best if you simply apologize and keep quiet for the remainder of your visit."

Phog turned his attention back to Ne Fuerje. "I'm sorry if-"

"That," she corrected.

"-that my turn of phrase offended. I am simply seeking knowledge and simultaneously pointing out a design flaw."

Ne Fuerje debated for a moment before sheathing the photon saber. "If you truly wish to make amends, there is something that I've been curious about concerning your people."

"What might that be?" Elma asked.

"I've heard that BLADE divides its members based on ability. I would like to know how exactly this works."

"Well, the divisions in BLADE are meant so that people who specialize in a certain area can take jobs that match their abilities, while still not being restricted to take missions that interest them."

"And to which of these do you belomg?"

"I'm a prospector. I find valuable metals. A lot of times we work with curators, who have a similar job."

"So then, why do you carry swords on your back and guns bye your side?"

"I wanna become a more well rounded as a BLADE operative. H.B. has this idea of making the division system obsolete; I just wanna help. If my team is attacked by a Simius or Vigent, I don't want to be a dead weight."

Ne Fuerje felt her respect for the human grow. Self improvement. A Wrothian ideal through and through.

Phog and Ne Fuerje walked together to the viewing platform as an impromptu session of earth Q & A sprung about.

As more and more Wrothians were drawn to the viewing platform, prince Ga Jiarg turned back to the usual members of Team Elma.

"So what is our first order of business?"

Lin piped up. "Technology! Remember that time we made a contest out of destroying stolen Caladars?"

"Yes. If I recall correctly, Ni Zain was injured just before you came to our rescue. What exactly became of him?"

Cross laughed. "He's one of the best cooks in New LA."

Lin hurried to return the topic to its original course. "Yeah yeah, he's very nice. So, anyway, I was reminded of that time when I saw Cross compete in the Wrothian Battle Gauntlet. It gave me a great idea as to a new Skell model."

"Intriguing. Go on."

"What if we combined our efforts to make a Skell-Caladar hybrid?!"

This made the prince pause. "I shall have to send some of our top pilots. This could be a breakthrough for the both of our peoples."

Lin squealed in excitement before hyperventilating. It only took three seconds for her to faint. Tatsu let out a garbled yelp as Lin's unconscious body fell right on top of him.

The Wrothians pelting Phog with questions unanimously looked to the fallen human. "Do humans normally do that?" one of them asked.

"Well yes and no," Phog answered. "Humans can hyperventilate and pass out, but she's a bit of a special case."


	2. Beware the Local Fauna

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Doug is tired, Murderess is smug, Bozé is 100% weeb, and Frye is 100% not letting that go.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Frye swears a bit throughout the chapter. If this is an issue, feel free to skip this chapter.

Doug Barrett was a man that considered himself pretty easygoing. A few people would disagree with this sentiment, but the fact stood was that you didn't sit through tens of failed flight tests for skells unless you had a high tolerance for things going sideways. Sure, the fact that Cross had somehow managed snag the one successful test flight rankled a bit, but he felt like he was owed at least a little something for crashing as often as he did.

His best friend turning traitor? That stung, but Lao had ultimately chose humanity in the end. That helped soothe things. Finding out that project Exodus had saw fit to play hot potato with his body and mind? That was hard to take, but at least he was able to keep himself busy. Really, it only got weird when he thought about it for too long.

As easygoing as he was, and as much as he needed a distraction, the team he was currently piloting with was on another level entirely. He had asked Cross to accompany him on his latest bout of tyrant hunting, but unfortunately, Cross had some kind of diplomatic mission already. Cross had referred to two people that would be glad to help out.

Doug had assembled his team, deployed his favorite skell, and set out. All in all, they were a solid team. Doug would be glad to have them on his team in the future; just as long as they all weren't on his team _at the same time._

"Frye, please, for the last time, call me sensei," Bozé said exasperatedly.

"Ha! Like hell," Frye said. "You can't teach jack shit."

Doug sighed, as the two continued to bicker.

"Boys, please, you're both pretty," the fourth and final member of their team said. Truth be told, Doug didn't really trust Murderess. The only reason she was on this team was because nobody really felt like arguing with her.

"Honestly, I'm more surprised you know what the term means," Bozé said. "I had figured the only Japanese you knew was 'sake.'"

"And I assumed the only dose of Japanese culture you really got was from watching anime," Frye shot back immediately.

Bozé shook in rage and made a cut-off snarling sound as Murderess burst with laughter. Frye waited for Bozé to offer another verbal counter, but none came. "Holy crap," Frye said. "Am I actually right about that? Oh shit!" Frye howled with laughter. "Who wants to bet it's not even most anime? Just the basic shit like Avatar and Naruto?"

"I'd believe it," Murderess said.

"For your information," Bozé said, "Avatar is not actually anime; merely inspired by anime."

"Even better!" Fyre said, before throwing his head back in laughter.

"Frye Christoph, you have about ten minutes left to live," Bozé said seriously.

Frye addressed the rest of the team. "All here who think Bozé is a basic bitch, say aye."

Despite himself, Doug joined in, along with Frye and Murderess. "Aye."

"Opposed?"

"Nay," Bozé said.

"The ayes have it!" Frye said. "Bozé Lowes is officially a basic bitch."

"Frye, you're ten minutes has been shortened to five."

Doug noticed the display in his cockpit. "Kill each other later. Right now we have things to do."

"Hey, Lowes," Murderess said. "I've got something that will cheer you up. How much do you want to bet Frye gets hit first?"

Bozé looked thoughtful. "It is unbecoming of a soldier to gamble. But if it _were_ to happen. . ."

Murderess smirked. "Just give me a number when you're ready." She then checked her pockets, taking out a few tiny objects.

"Ear plugs?" Doug asked. "What are you carrying those for?"

"Do you remember what species this tyrant belongs to? Or, wait, did you even read that information?"

Doug looked away sheepishly. "I remember it was one of the smaller guys. Shouldn't be anything we can't handle."

"I'll drink to that," Frye said.

Murderess just smirked. "No need to worry about me. I'll probably do better than the rest of you with these things in my ears."

Doug frowned. He had the distinct impression that Murderess knew something that he didn't. He shrugged in his cockpit. As he had said, it wouldn't be anything the four of them couldn't handle.

* * *

Doug had been right by half. Victory was theirs, however it had come at a very steep, very annoying price. As he parked his skell outside of the barracks, Doug saw Murderess smirk. She called something out to him. He couldn't make it out, but he suspected that was the entire point.

Bozé, ever a man of his word, silently handed her a handful of credits.

Doug stretched out his arms and shoulders, relieved to be out of the cockpit. It was a bit strange that mimeosomes had been made to be able to experience muscle fatigue, but then again, it wasn't quite as strange compared to his current situation.

He saw Elma's team returning from the east gate, accompanied by a blond young man, who soon ran over to Frye. That's right, Frye had mentioned a brother.

Doug turned in time to see Lin running up to him. She could see her talking to him, probably asking how his mission went. When she paused, expecting an answer, he sighed. "I CAN'T HEAR YOU!" He shouted, touching his ears. "Terebra Tyrant!"

Frye, meanwhile, had explained the same thing to his brother, and the two had started to communicate via sign language.

Bozé noticed the Christoph siblings, and walked up to them. " _You speak sign language?_ " he signed.

Frye grinned. " _Hell yeah, I do. Phog wanted to learn and he needed a practice partner._ "

Bozé paused for a moment. " _Would you like to get a drink?_ "

" _I mean, I was gonna celebrate with a drink anyways, but sure. If you're offering to pay, who am I to say no?_ "


End file.
